February 19

"Some people do not have to search, they find their niche early in life and rest there, seemingly contented and resigned. They do not seem to ask much of life, sometimes they do not seem to taking it seriously. At times I envy them, but I do not understand them. Seldom do they understand me. I am one fo the searchers. There are, I believe, millions of us. We are not unhappy, but neither are we really content. We continue to explore ourselves, hoping to understand. We like to walk along the beach; we are drawn by the ocean, taken by its power, its unceasing motion, its mystery and unspeakable beauty. We like forests and mountains, deserts and hidden rivers, and lonely cities as well. Our sadness is as much a part of our lives as is our laughter. To share our sadness with one we love is perhaps as great a joy as we can know - unless it is to share laughter. We searchers are ambitious only for life itself, for everything beautiful it can provide. Most of all we want to love and be loved. We want to live in a relationship that will not impede our wandering, nor prevent our search, nor lock us in prison walls; that will take us for what little we have to give. We do not want to prove ourselves to another or to compete for love. This...is for wanderers, dreamers, and lovers, for lonely men and women who dare to ask of life everything good and beautiful. It is for those who are too gentle to live among wolves." - James Kavanaugh


Matt and I were LODs (Leader of the Day) yesterday. We paddled about six naut. miles to a cool beach where we landed and did a day hike to a spectacular lake. We wanted to switch up our routine a bit and use our poor legs that have been so neglected. We knew that there was a lake near this beach only because of our map, so when we landed we scouted for about 45 mins and determined that the terrain was hikeable and the group seemed stoked about trying to find this lake. It was a hot day so everyone was hiking without shirts and absorbing all that wonderful vitamin D. We made it to the lake - a gorgeous spot where our instructors said that most likely no human being has ever been. Some of the guys and instructors went swimming, yelling as they jumped in and frantically swam through the frigid water. On our way down, we stopped for a break and two huge condors were circling above us in the sky - sometimes getting so close I could see details in their wings and heads. We watched them soar for awhile and then continued on our way.

Today we have a layover day and we did some paddling Olympics. It was hilarious to see the rivalry between the two teams, especially between Murilo and Guppy. Those two are so funny together - they remind me of characters from the Three Stooges.

Murilo also gave a "connection with nature" class in a beautiful spot on a hillside overlooking the channel below us. His thoughts reminded me of what is truly important and the reasons why I did this trip in the first place. He discussed the connection with nature and the evolution of the disconnection between man and nature. Strangely enough, over the past 25 days I seem to have forgotten my passion and connection with the natural world. Due to the nature of this expedition (and lest I forget I am technically at school right now), we have not had much spare time for reflection. No time to stop and breathe and enjoy the silence. During his class we talked a lot about society and its downfalls. Being out here is what it means to be human. The greed, competitiveness, the negativity, and materialism - it overwhelms our brains and makes us think believe that those things are natural; we think that our lives at home are natural. Being out here is what is natural and what our bodies are designed to do. This is what is means to be human.
One of my goals for the future is to live simply. I'm going to appreciate the small things, realize what is excessive, and take nothing for granted.